do you mind if i knit

I'd rather be..................

That's the thing about working from home, distractions. It's oh so easy to stop work and have a break. I've been working from home for over twelve years now, so I've mostly got the 'break' thing under control. The simple answer when people ask me how I keep motivated at work is this, if I don't do my work, I don't get paid, and I can't afford not to be paid, my yarn addiction would not be the smallish problem it is at the moment, it would be my ruin.

Some days it is harder to buckle down and get on with work. Hot sunny days are the worst, when the garden is full of roses, (they are particularly good this year, there's a real bonanza of flowers), when it looks so pretty and inviting, and it's just the right temperature for sitting out, with a cup of tea and my knitting. Today was one of those days. We've been treated to heat, sun and happy birds all day, and I wish these photos of my knitting and cup of tea in the garden represented reality, but unfortunately the deadline to finish the  book I'm working on is looming, and I'm nowhere near finished, so I have been shackled to my desk most of the day.

I said the garden has a lot of roses blooming this year, but in these photos, you can't see the roses I'm growing, they're all over to the left of the garden, which gets the most sun.

I must show you one rose which has just started to flower, she's a beauty.

This is the rose 'Lady of Shalott', above, aren't her flowers beautiful! I bought her from David Austin, after seeing her introduction, when I watched the Chelsea Flower Show on t.v, in 2009. She's meant to be good at resisting disease, and flowers profusely I understand. I shall have to wait and see on both counts, as the summer progresses.

I must cut a few of my roses, and bring them indoors, so I can enjoy them, there are so many about to burst in to flower, I can spare a few for the house.

Over the last few years I've grown to love yellow roses, which is strange, as I used to dislike them. I can pinpoint exactly when I started to change my opinion of them. I heard that Kate Spade always has a bouquet of them on her desk. I love the style and colours of Kate Spade, so when I heard she has to have them on her desk at all times, I stopped to think about this little fact. I imagined lots of yellow flowers in a perfect dome shape (in one of those low round bowl-like vases), and I pictured them set against chalky pink, duck-egg blue, grey chalk or a 50's soft green. And the effect of this imagining made me think I had been judging them unfairly.

I love pink roses too, but there's something about yellow roses. And I quite like that I opened myself up to liking them, I like having my perceptions changed.

Oooh, is that the time! It's time I got going to my Wednesday night knitting group. I'd better dash. See you Friday, fingers crossed, I'll have started on the fair isle bit of my dress. Love Vanessa xxx

Tender Loving Care.

Hello! Lovely to see you, just lovely, after a week of being away, it's just very nice to be back with you.

I've not been well over the last week. Last Monday my sister made the decision to drive 400 or so miles to come and collect me, and take me all the way back to her house for a lot of love and TLC. Being with her and her family has done me a power of good, and if it wasn't for having to get on with a huge work load and a very tight deadline, I'd probably still be there. Yesterday my sister drove me to a half-way point between her house and mine, and Hugo met us at the half-way point, collected me and my luggage, and we drove back home. About five hours it takes. I'm still feeling a little wobbly, but am on the mend, and it's lovely to be home.

And that, my dearest readers, is why I missed doing my last three blog posts, so I'm sorry about my absence, and hope no more glitches rear their ugly little heads, and keep me away from your company.

Oooohhh, it is SO nice to see you again!

Ellie and Douglas, (our two Miniature wire-haired Dachshunds), came to my sister's with me too. That's Ellie, in the photo above, waiting in the hallway for Millie, my Niece, to return from school. Ellie Loves children, just LOVES them.

Douglas (above) is positively and neurotically terrified of children, and hides at the mere whiff of them. My Nephew George wasn't particularly interested in the doggies, but Millie was besotted, and absolutely determined to make Douglas trust and like her. This left Ellie, (who was more than willing to be adored by Millie), slightly out of the loop at times. Millie did win Douglas over mostly, as won-over as he'll ever be by a small child.

There's that special doleful look Douglas does so well (above).

I was just wondering, have you noticed that Ellie, my girl dog, and Millie, my Niece, have similar sounding names?

There's a little story behind that. We got Ellie as a puppy, and named her Ellie. My sister was pregnant with Millie at the time. We announced our news to my sister of getting a tiny little puppy, and that her name was Ellie, on the phone. I didn't expect the stunned silence on the other end.

We'd unwittingly given our puppy the same name my sister and her husband were going to give their daughter. Very gracefully, I thought, my sister and brother-in-law found a new name for their girl, a very similar sounding name infact.

When Millie was younger, she used to get confused when we were calling Ellie, and there were a few tears occassionally when we were shouting at Ellie not to do something, and Millie thought we were telling her off.

Hugo likes to call Millie "Millicent".

Another member of my sister's family is Bob the hamster. (I always want to laugh when I hear Bob's name, it's just such a funny name for a hamster, I do love it). (And I hope Millie doesn't read this, because at six-and-a-half years old she's an excellent reader, and probably won't take kindly to me finding her hamster's name funny).

My sister and I had hamsters as pets when we were children, and I've always loved their tininess and quivery little whiskers. Bob is absolutely adorable. And it turns out he's a born hamster model, the little chap posed beautifully for me, sitting very comfortably on my sister's hand.

Millie was meant to have cleaned his cage out, I hope she's done that.

As hamsters go, and I may be biased here, I think Bob is rather beautiful.

And very, very sweet.

Aren't hamster ears paper thin? Bob doesn't like having his head stroked (my sister seems to know all Bob's likes and dislikes), so I never got to touch Bob's ears, but they look like bits of soft tissue paper don't you think? And he looks like he gets a manicure once a week too.

In my last post, I talked about cutting my knitting in half. Well you'll never guess what. Jane Waller, who wrote the book inwhich the pattern for my dress I was knitting appears in, left me a comment! Slightly embarrassing that. She very graciously avoided mentioning my sabotage of her dress pattern, and instead chose to compliment me on a previous post. Isn't that so nice and polite?

The latest on my sabotaged dress is that I'm keeping a respectful distance from it. I said I was going to continue knitting the top stripey half downwards, to make it into a dress in its own right. Well, I added increases, and went up a needle size, and it looked a mess. Normally I just mumble "oh well", and rip back my knitting, and start again telling myself it's all for the best. This time, I've ripped it all back, and come to a stop. And actually started on a different dress pattern.

You know what? I think the 'stripey dress' will just become a stripey jumper. I can admit defeat occasionally.

Yep, I'm having a break from the dress I was knitting, by starting on another dress. This new one is designed to hide all lumps and bumps, but there are no guarantees in life are there?

Just before I go, I'm just going to start telling you Millie's favourite joke at the moment. This joke was told to her whole school in assembly one morning, by the headmaster (or prime minister, as Millie likes to call him).

"What kind of bee can you milk?"

I shall tell you the answer on Wednesday.         :  )

Lovely to be back, (I know I keep on saying that), but really, it is love-er-ly to see you. Till Wednesday then me hearties. Love Vanessa xxx

Garden flowers.

Lovely day here today, sun shining, birds singing and tweeting, and me enjoying it all, from the peace of my studio.

And the garden is starting to twinkle with spring flowers, I love spring flowers. And I get a lot of pleasure picking flowers from my garden, I have to admit, I feel ever so pleased that I've been able to grow them. All of the flowers above are from my garden. Amazing.

Especially the Snakeshead Fritillary, that flower at the back with a snakeskin pattern on its petals, these are extraordinary little flowers.

I was determined to paint the Fritillaries this year, I missed doing that last year. And the Auriculas.

I started painting them yesterday, and have been unable to stop myself from painting them today, when I should be working on the final roughs for the mole book I'm working on.

You see we're going on holiday for two whole weeks this Friday, and they'll be long gone by the time I get back. We're going to Turkey.

Did I mention it was for two whole weeks!

There's the possibility that I'll be able to do some blog posts from where we're staying, hopefully it will possible, and I'll be able to continue my usual blogging pattern. Fingers crossed.

Just incase it's not possible, I'll say goodbye now.

I don't like goodbyes!

I'll just say cheerio, and hope I'll see you on my holiday, but apologies if it turns out not to be possible. Cheerio then, Love Vanessa xxx

We've been living in a howling gale.

Hello! I've just been talking to my sister and nephew on Skype, it's wonderful to be able to see them, whilst chatting. Millie, my niece, wasn't available for interview.

So the long and the short of it is that I've left myself very little time to say hello to you today, before I go to my Wednesday night knitting group.

D'you see the rain sodden pane of glass in the photo above? We've suddenly done an about turn, and been plunged straight back into winter, here in the North of England, and a wet winter at that, which is the worst.

I think we've done well to keep the roof on our house.

So I've been painting away all this week, getting very absorbed by it all.

Over the weekend, I started the paintings above, and I've continued working on them, as well as trying to do some abstracts.

I quite like they way they influence each other, a discovery in one, leads to something happening in another. It's exciting.

I'm hoping, hoping, hoping, I'll have time to paint the glorious frilly tulips in the vase above, and the Ranunculus too. The colours in the flowers have been influencing some of my colour choices with my abstracts.

I've been changing their water, and snipping off a little at the bottom of each flower stem, every other day, in the never ending battle to keep my fresh flowers FRESH!

Tomorrow I present the paintings I have done for the two commissions. I hope, very, very, very much, they like them. I'll take some photos of the paintings tomorrow, before my meeting at one. I get commissioned to do art work by publishers, and that doesn't phase me too much now, after twelve years of it (though it used to), but this is a new experience, presenting two people with the art work they have commissioned from me. The question "what if they don't like them" is needling me slightly. I've even done extra paintings, so that they have a choice. Keen aren't I?!

Well, I'm off to my knitting group now. I'm not too far off finishing that fourth panel for the knitted dress, I talked about a couple of posts back, then it's on to the stripes! Yipee!

See you on Friday, and I'll tell you all about the reception the paintings I did got, even if it turns out to be a disappointing reception. One has to prepare oneself mentally for these things, good thing I'm quite well practised at it now.

Toodle-loo, love Vanessa xxx

Worth lots to me.

I'm pleased as punch, can't tell you how pleased I am with these two buys above.

On the left, a detail on one of two plates I saw in the window of a charity shop, and had to buy. And on the right, a little indulgence from when I was in a Cath Kidston shop before Christmas last year, a little pencil case/cosmetic bag, the pattern of which gives me an enormous amount of pleasure, it's just gorgeous. Provencal Rose the pattern's called.

The plate : 59 pence. The bag, I think about a fiver, probably less, I can't quite remember.

Relative to how much I spent on these things, I'd say I've done enormously well on the amount of happiness their patterns have brought me. Just goes to show, it's not always about how much you spend, is it?

Like flowers from the garden, or pretty weeds, in a jam jar, cost nothing, and they always make me want to do a happy little hop and a skip.

Pebbles collected from the beach, their beauty gives me a lot of joy.

This is going to start turning in to a list, and I suspect that once I get going, I'll find it difficult to put a lid on my list of happy little things, so I think I'll stop before I really get started.

There you go, a view of both my precious plates.

I was just having a look on google, to see if I could find out more about this pattern.

Not a single sausage came up about this pattern. Now I'm really intrigued. Any of you know this pattern, and how you can get hold of it? Ta-thanks.

You may have noticed the bit of knitting on display, under the plates, in one of the above photos?

Yes, indeedy, that is my knitting, I'm currently working on.

Yum, aren't these Anemones just beautiful? Just had to interrupt the knitting proceedings with these exquisite flowers.

I've been gazing at them, sitting on my desk, whilst I work on some abstract paintings. I desperately want to paint them, but I do need to get the abstracts done for the gallery and florist.

To have these on my desk whist I'm working ............... well, it feels special, to have such beautiful blooms near me. The sky has been a deep dark grey all day, and the house feels and looks dark too. These dark sky days can be difficult, but having some searing crimson red flowers sitting nearby whilst I work, has helped the day to feel quite nice.

That has to be a good example of "mind over matter", don't you think. That's a phrase my dad used to use with us a lot when I was a child, and it's stuck with me, along with "you've got nothing to lose by trying". They should probably teach these two phrses in schools!

Shall we return to the knitting then?

I've now knitted three panels for the skirt section of the dress I'm knitting, and have started on the fourth. It will be good to get these finished, I have to admit. I knew it would get tiresome knitting all four panels at once, but I always like to save the best till last, and I think knitting the striped top section of the dress will be more fun than knitting the one colour skirt part.

Here's a photo of the dress I'm knitting, just incase you haven't seen it yet:

I'll be making the sleeves longer in my version, I'll feel the cold if the sleeves stay short.

So here we are, two panels for the back of the skirt, and one panel for the front, a little way to go till that last panel is finished.

It's an interesting texture that's being knitted up, don't you think?

I've started to lose a bit of my original bouncy joy at knitting these panels. I can do 'long-distance' knitting, but now the end is in sight, I just want this part to be done. "It's all in the mind" as my dad would say. I need to get a grip for this last section of the marathon.

I'm going to get back to my painting now.

Hugo is away till Sunday, he's sailing with a group of people, on the West coast of Scotland.

It's very quiet around here without Hugo (he left on Thursday afternoon), and there's no getting out for walks with the doggies, because Ellie has kennel cough (as diagnosed by the vet on Thursday), and has to be kept indoors, with Douglas, who doesn't have it yet, but may well catch it, as kennel cough is highly contagious. My neighbour and I are trying to stop them from getting bored by taking it in turns to have them every few hours! Poor things, no walkies, life is going to seem incredibly dull and frustrating for them I imagine! We think Ellie picked up the kennel cough on one of their walks.

I miss Hugo a lot, but at the same time, it's giving me lots of work time. This morning I managed to sleep over the alarm, because I didn't have my customary second wake up call, in the form of Hugo with a cuppa. It's a radio alarm, and I put it up very loud, because I've started to sleep through it in the mornings lately, but normally Hugo makes sure I'm awake. The radio really was pretty loud, it's amazing I didn't wake up till 9:30. I'l try turning it up full volume tonight!

Just one more picture before I pootle off.

I do love my red anemones.

Have a good weekend, my dear readers, see you on Monday. Cheerio. Love Vanessa xxx

Flower tonic.

Hello, hello, new, fresh bright start to a new fresh as a daisy week!

You o.k? Your day grey? Or BRIGHT?

My day grey outside, BRIGHT inside, in my nice pink walled studio.

(My Niece's bedroom is painted pink, it's the colour of love, did you know that? So when Millie (my Niece) wakes each morning, she's surrounded by love and reassurance. My sister used to work for Dulux, so she's an arbiter of colour therapy. And actually, I'm with her on that one, COLOUR, with CAPITALS, definitely brightens up my life).

And that's why I love my studio, my lovely pink studio.

Even if it does look like a burglar has been rummaging through all the drawers and cupboards.

It actually looks like my Father-in-Law's office (he's a very busy Vicar).

I enjoy hearing his story, told to all newcomers to the house, of the time someone looking after the house whilst they were away, reported with great anxiety that a burglar had been in his office, and tipped the contents of his filing cabinet, drawers and shelves onto the floor, and whisked it all up like a food mixer.

Alan (my Father-in-Law) had to reassure him that this was how his office always looks.

I recently found a library book under a pile of papers in my studio, that was overdue, to my dismay. One of the piles of piles in my studio.

Another thing my sister is an arbiter of, is making lists.

I don't make lists, I just have a pile of priorities.

Tidying my studio, ironing, tidying the house, making the bed, washing up, these are all things that are "on the list", in my head.

The list in my head.

Last week, the mystery pattern for Coats Crafts was ticked off my list. Today, the two commissions for eight abstract paintings, worked on over the last month, were finally done to my satisfaction, and ticked off my list.

Tomorrow I pick up receipts blowing around my studio floor, and get up to date on my accounts.

Once that horrible task is completed, I can then tidy the studio, and start work on the abstracts that are to go into a gallery and a posh florist.

You probably have an image of me living in some sort of nice ordered house, don't ya?!!! I imagine my photos make it look that way. I'm actually a very tidy person, with a tendency to be obsessively tidy, that's my true nature. My mum tells me I would have a little tantrum if my room wasn't tidy, and I actually believe her, (though I'm not sure I believe all her stories about my childhood!). But when you become an adult, you have to face the reality of life don't you? And being tidy is not neccessarily the most important thing in an adult life, is it?

Because I'm naturally a tidy person, life always feels much better when my house is in order.

And when it's not in order, I feel like I'm winging it, teetering on the edge, and if I don't keep my balance, chaos will ensue. That's definitely proof I'm a tidy person at heart, because messiness does not come naturally to me. Messiness is a by-product of too much to do, and not enough time to do it in.

And I just know I'm speaking to a few of you out there.

I'm messy, not out of choice, but out of neccessity! I just don't have the time to tidy up. So there we go.

It will all be done in good time.

Still, I do have the time, and I certainly like to make the time, to say hello to you my dear readers, because you are important.

And I do have the time to stop and smell the flowers.

And give you a big smile.

And say, "Isn't life GREAT! I'm busy and tired and happy".

And I can smell supper. Hugo is about to say "right, dinner is served!" (I call it supper, Hugo calls it dinner). I can feel it bubbling up, judging by the smells.

So I'll say, after one more flower pic:

And just one more for the road:

CHEERIO! Love Vanessa xxx

My neighbour's Narcissi.

Hello! Here I am, organised with my blog post today, no last-minute rushing, and I can give you my attention for the next hour, no interruptions, and no rushing off. Lovely.

I was thinking about my neighbour's window boxes today, and wondering when their Daffodils and Narcissi are going to say hello. I'm not a curtain twitcher when it comes to the neighbours, (I don't peer from behind the curtains, watching for the neighbours comings-and-goings, though I do like to make sure 'Auntie' Anne next door is well).

But I do notice their flower pots and window boxes.

One of the neighbours a few doors down, has a window box, which for a start, I'm amazed stays perched on the window sill, and secondly, I'm always astounded that it has anything growing in it, it just looks, well............... barren and untended, totally neglected. But each year something struggles to appear from it, which makes me want to give the flowers a medal for tenacity, quite frankly.

Actually, I'm a fine one to talk, I've got a very dead Marguerite bush in the pot outside our front door. It never survives the frost, so each year I have to dig up the dead plant, and replace it. I put the same variety of plant back in, and each year we get a huge bush of white daisy flowers, which wouldn't look out of place at Chelsea Flower Show. I like to think!

Anyway, back to the subject of tough and courageous plants in my neighbours window box.

Last year I took a series of photos of the said window box, when taking the dogs for their afternoon walks. We would pass by, and I'd get my camera out, and look decidedly dodgy, photographing my neighbours window box.

A lady walking up the street gave me a very strange look, so I made sure she saw me unlock our front door and go inside the house. I was very close to announcing to her, that I was not some burglar eyeing up the neighbour's house, I was a proper neighbour, who just happened to be taking a lot of interest in their flowers.

Last year there were three bulbs in the window box. Narcissi have a nice habit of reproducing themselves and spreading their sunny goodness around, so I'm hoping that this year there will be at least six plants, rather than the three that appeared last year.

I shall keep you posted on the progress of my neighbour's window box.

I quite like the reflection of the people walking by on the walls, that you can just see in the glass behind the narcissi. You see the figure with the pram?

Wonder what that person thought I was up to.

And now for something which I've been meaning to show you, which has absolutely nothing to do with plants or flowers, or neighbour's window boxes, but which are equally dear to my heart................... no, dearer!

My babies. One fully grown baby, and two tiny babies.

One of them seems to have woken up.

And gone back to sleep.

Douglas, who is outstretched on Hugo, above, spends his evenings reclining on his lord and master like this, if Hugo is watching the t.v.

It's very unusual for Ellie to be snuggled up like she is.

Ellie does most certainly NOT like sharing her space with Douglas, so that is why quick, blurry shots like above are taken, trying to capture the unheard of, before Ellie decides she has had enough, and Douglas is to bloomin well clear off.

It's mostly a case of Douglas having to rely on humans for a cuddle, and he really loves cuddles. If he tries to climb into Ellie's bed with her, there is much gnashing of teeth from her Royal Highness, Queen of all she surveys, Ellie.

Hugo has a theory that they cuddle up together when we're not looking.

Anyway, time to change the subject again.................

You know my Little Squares Scarf? (Pattern in my sidebar to the left). Well, I was excited to get a nice message from Bley, of Bibliosophy blog today, saying she was inspired by my Little Squares Scarf to make a baby jacket! Isn't that fantastic?! Bley is waiting for the imminent arrival of her baby, and has made the jacket incase her baby is a girl. The jacket she made is GORGEOUS, you can see it here. She provides a free tutorial on how to make it, and if I had a little someone to make this for, I would be following it immediately. (Her free pattern for making her 'Pretty Slouchy Bag' looks enticing too).

Gosh, is that the time? Fifty-five minutes has just flown by.

Well, I think I might go and get my knitting together, and hang up the damp washing. It's Wednesday night knitting group this evening, which I always look forward to. Here's to empty window boxes suddenly sprouting lots of lovely spring blooms! See you on Friday. Love Vanessa xx

Things that make me want to spend money.

Hello! Friday, Friday, Friday! Yippeeeee! Hugo's out shopping for ingredients, because his Dad is away, and we're having his Mum over for supper. What we're going to eat is a surprise. I'm sure it will be very nice, as Hugo loves to cook for other people.

I really am very fotunate that Hugo likes to cook, I think about just how fortunate, quite a lot.

I know that some of you are curious to know how my knitted dress is progressing. 'Slowly but surely' is the answer! But it is progressing, yep indeedy, one of four panels is completed, and I'm enjoying the knitting of it enormously. It's easy enough to do whilst watching t.v. but not so easy that I get bored, I like that sort of knitting.

Just to remind you, this is what I'm knitting, above. At the moment I'm working on the large one coloured area of the skirt section, which comprises of four panels.

So not much to show at the moment, but getting there.

Just had to show you this tray of Primulas I bought recently. Each little plant should have been put in a pot, but because I love them in a cluster in their tray, I'm holding off doing just that. But I'm sure their little roots would like a bit of growing room, so I must get that done. I bought them to paint, I love their colours. Spring flowers, love 'em, I think they have to be my favourite seasonal flowers.

I bought these Primulas to paint, but recently, shopping has been something I'm trying to avoid. If I spend any money, it's on flowers for my paintings, art materials for work, or gifts for Hen, for our swap. No purchasing of clothes (apart from the odd 50p jumper from a charity shop!), has been taking place over the last few months here, because things have been tight.

But I still look at glossy catalogues and fantasise about buying a little something.

I turn down the corner of the pages as though I'm going to buy something off that page, and whilst it's frustrating because I know I can't afford these things I see, I like to pretend that at some point I will be able to buy them.

Maybe.

Like things in the Cath Kidston catalogue! I'm loving some of her new patterns, especially that Provence one, (top left pic).

I don't actually NEED anything from the Cath K catalogue, but it would be lovely to be able to be able to order something.

Something I don't need.

Though I could possibly 'need' the floral fabric covered headboard above.

And I could see myself  'needing' the stripy scarves, (especially the red striped, and the green striped), the lime green trainers, and the lime green cardigan from Boden, above.

I am absolutely convinced I need all these things.

Because you know how it is, you can never stop needing scarves, shoes and cardigans. They are essential to exist happily on this earth.

One thing I do have to buy for my work, is flowers to paint. My local florist is just brilliant, but I like the idea of growing my own flowers to use as subject matter. If there is one catalogue to inspire in that department, it's Sarah Raven's catalogue. Her website is here.

She sells seeds, seedlings, lovely goods for cooking, gardening, displaying, and she loves colour. Sarah Raven is an inspiration.

I'd like to grow the Zinnia's and Sweet Peas, pictured above. I always find growing things from seed makes me think of the word 'miracle'. The point when the seed becomes a seedling, and just starts to emerge from the soil, then starts stretching up, up, up, is a truly magical sight.

And then actually producing flowers, real flowers! If things actually grow into plants that flower, it makes you feel like a miracle worker, even if the plant is doing all the hard work.

And now for magazines, the purveyors of perfect dreams, those unattainable perfect dream homes is what I'm alluding to. I love interiors magazines, but from lots of past experience, am aware that they are full of pitfalls in terms of relieving you of cash.

Firstly, there's the cost. One magazine, well that's o.k.

Two magazines, you're getting into a suddenly much larger hole in your wallet.

Then there's all those things they list the price of, inside the magazines. Very dangerous. Such nice things, that would make your home so very nice, but would need to be hidden from one's better half.

Things that put a special glint in the eye, a glint of "I want, I need, I've always wanted, my life would be improved by having", that sort of glint.

I have many, many catalogues with pages turned down. I'm not sure how many years back some of these catalogues go, kept because they're nice to look at. I never throw out a Cath Kidston catalogue, they're so pretty.

Many things I don't need, but one thing I do need is flowers, colourful flowers. I always have, and I always will, I think they're an essential for my well being!

Something I really do need to do now, is finish up. Hugo has gone to collect his Mum, because the weather is atrocious, and I need to be off the computer and ready to join in the conversation when she arrives.

So I'll love you and leave you till Monday. Have a good weekend, no, actually, have a GREAT weekend, hope you do! Cheerio. Love Vanessa xxx

I was just thinking..............

Hello dear readers, and welcome to a new week, full of possibilities (I like to think).

So much better to start the week positively, isn't it?

I was thinking about you all, as I sat down to do my blog, and I was thinking about me.

I was thinking, "I wonder if it's o.k. to thank you all again for your helpful and encouraging comments about my new work?" Am I over-doing it by thanking you all the time, and will it become mundane? Then I thought "Naaahhh, I'll thank all my dear readers as much as I want, because when ever I do, it's from the heart".

You're all nurturing me, like watering a seedling, and I'm starting to stretch my leaves and grow. Your comments have made a huge difference to my confidence, huge. I feel excited about my paintings, and eager to know what you think. I can genuinely say that you are helping me to grow, really, really, honestly grow! Thank you so much, thank you so, so much!

So it was with my paintings in mind, that I asked my Father-in-Law, Alan, for some more Snowdrops. Alan very kindly dug up a huge clump for me, and gave me some moss too, which was a nice added touch. I then went home and broke the clump into smaller bits, and potted them up into cups and bowls. That's a messy business. Soil everywhere.

What is it about bulbs planted in cups and bowls that's so pleasing?! And that added touch of the moss covering the soil, just so pretty!

I'm always a bit over optimistic with my acquisition of flowers for my still lives, I buy too many, thinking I'll be able to paint them all before they wilt and die. I think I must have been born with the belief that achieving the unachievable is attainable. Even when I repeatedly don't attain the unattainable, I still believe I'll attain it the next time.

Perhaps it's just optimism. 

So, yes, I'm optimistic that I'll be painting each and every one of these cups and bowls planted up with Snowdrops.

I'm optimistic about doing all that painting, even though I have a freshly cut pile of paper, sitting on my desk. This pile of paper, cut to size, is ready for me start drawing on it. That's the first thing I do, before starting the rough drawings for a book I'm illustrating, cut the paper to size.

I'm starting on a new mole book, the fifth in the series. Even though I know mole and his friends, and where they live, from the previous four books I've illustrated, I always have a panic before starting a new book. "I don't know if I'm capable of doing this," always runs through my mind. It's much worse when I'm doing a book where I have to start from scratch with the characters and setting. Infact, maybe I shouldn't be thinking about it, because I'm starting to perspire with anxiety.

It will be fine once I start drawing, and get to know my pal mole again, and his friends.

Still, there's always an element of horror at the start of a new book project! Strange, isn't it.

When I'm working, I sit at a desk, which I'm always telling myself is much too small.

"My desk really is much too small".

Sometimes, I look at my desk, and smile, because I'm reminded of an acquaintance who visited my studio. She was horrified at my desk. When I'm drawing, I prop the board up on the cardboard box you can see in the picture above, so I'm not bending over my work too much. The horrified lady was insistent that I needed a 'proper' desk, like architects use. And when I say insistent, I mean INSISTENT. I have to say, she was banging her head against a brick wall, because that cardboard box is the PERFECT height to lean my board on. Plus, I've been using that cardboard box since the first moment I started illustrating professionally, twelve years ago. So of course, my desk wouldn't feel quite right without that cardboard box helping me on my way. That cardboard box will be going out with me when I'm in a box.

Still, my desk is too small. I really must get a bigger desk. A bigger studio too. That would be nice. When I see photos of artists in their factory sized studios, in glossy magazines, I always think, "they've made it, they're successful, they've got a nice big studio". If I ever get a nice big studio, I will have a great big sofa in it, and a huge desk, and fantastic storage for all my materials. I remember visiting the studio of an artist on the Island of Westray, one of the Orkney Islands. It was beautiful, and big, and it had a flag-stone floor with under-floor heating. There was a huge stone sink, walls lined with cupboards and sets of drawers, and a view to the sea, through lots of windows. I felt physical pain when I saw it, I wanted that studio to be mine so very badly.

There was another studio I saw once which provoked a similar pain filled response, in Yorkshire, in the hills above a valley. It wasn't inhabited when I saw it, I think it had just finished being built. It was a reasonably large size, built of honey coloured stone, with sky lights, and floor to ceiling glass at the front, plain white interior walls, all looking out onto the valley that stretched away into the distance below. I had been looking for a spot to eat my sandwiches, so I parked at the bottom of the driveway full of builder's rubble, and ate my sandwiches staring at the view, trying not to get indigestion whilst thinking about the studio behind me, not belonging to me.

We must all have our dreams, musn't we?

But for the moment, I am concentrating on the idea of squeezing in everything I want to do today. Over the weekend I started a new painting, and it needs to be finished before the flowers crumble. So I think I shall go and transform my small desk from illustration work mode, to painting still lives work mode. After I've made a cup of tea and eaten those last chocolate segments Hugo has foolishly left in the cupboard.

So I shall see you again on Wednesday, when I hope to be in a frame of mind where my world consists largely of little animal characters, who have little personalities, and whom I'm besotted with. That will mean I've got over my initial anxiety over starting a new book, and am well and truly engrossed in it!

Ta-ra for now. Love Vanessa xxx

That was so nice!

Hello and howdy, and a skip hop and a jump! Such a nice thing happened today, plus, all the affectionate comments you've been leaving me on Monday's post, have helped to put that special skip in my jump.

I was in my studio, trying out new ways of creating pictures, (I should have been working on my new book for Walker, another Mole book, the fifth mole book), but this is my version of skiving.

These abstract watercolours I've started doing, are running parallel to some more figurative work, I've mentioned I'm working on, before. I'll share both with you sometime.

I was just thinking about a cup of tea. (This refers to my not being able to drink tea, in Monday's post). Today was the first day I could eat normally, and drink tea! Yippee! Freedom to drink tea, it's just, well, wonderful!

Anyway, as I was sitting at my desk, the doorbell rang. On opening the door, there were my cheery Parent's-in-Law, come to see how I was doing. And Alan, my Father-in-Law, presented me with a wonderful gift! A bowl of Snowdrops he had potted up, and added a lovely touch, by arranging moss around the flowers.

It's made my day to receive their visit, and such a lovely gift. If there's one thing that makes me hop-skip-jump happy, it's a gift of flowers.

Just lovely, aren't they? I sat down and started doing a painting of them, as soon as Alan and Susan had left. If I've finished it by my next post, I'll show it to you.

When someone pots up bulbs for you, I always think it makes a wonderful gift. Susan potted up some Hyacinth Bulbs for me, as part of my Christmas present, a tradition she keeps every year. This year it was some gorgeous pink flowers that emerged. I love the surprise of seeing what colour they are going to be.

They're looking luscious. I've got them sitting on a window sill, in a corridor. They're the perfect flower to swish past, as I trot down the stairs, because the scent, being quite strong, doesn't dominate too much in the corridor. I love that quick sniff, which stays with me for just the right length of time.

That pink! Glorious!

I'm off to myWednesday night knitting group now, with Susan. Think I'll work on sewing the ends in on my fair Isle scarf. I've decided to do a very light sewing in of the ends, because as the scarf is going to be halved, and sewn up one side, I don't need to do a thorough job of making them secure. All the ends will be tucked up, safe and secure, in the middle of the scarf.

I've also decided to blog three times a week, rather than the five times I have tried to achieve in the past. I'll be blogging on a Monday, Wednesday and Friday from now on. It will give me more time for my painting, plus, blogging four or five times a week was taking a lot of time. I've been thinking about reducing my blogging time, for some months, and was reluctant to 'announce' it, and reluctant to admit to myself that it was tiring me out, the blogging, work, house, life and everything. This way, I think there won't be so much pressure to keep up.

Well, my dear readers, I shall see you on Friday then! That'll be the Friday out of my new Monday, Wednesday, Friday routine. I quite like the ring that has! Thank you for popping by. Love Vanessa xxx